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30 Apr 2019 | Samantha Dugan

Champagne: How Deep is Your Lust?

“Have fun pouring and selling those big, fat, round, lusty Pinot Noir-based Champagnes!”

Randy’s voice bellowing, him walking out the door at the end of his workday, me placing tasting sheets at each place setting for another sold-out Champagne tasting, the early part of my workday.

His words still hanging in the air sort of like a cartoon bubble, “Those big, fat, round Pinot Noir” and while as a “curvy girl” I appreciate the fact that some folks find thick curves and densely packed flesh lusty, is that the definition of lusty or sexy for everyone?

I knew that a little over half the wines I was featuring that evening were in fact that palate-coating, groan-inducing, rich, thick bodied and staining style of Champagne, but the other half?

No, the other half of the Pinot Noir-based champagnes were that other kind of wildly compelling and sexy, that slither their way into your brain and slowly, deliberately, unmistakably stoke your consciousness and arouse your curiosity in a way that makes your heart pound.  

One style likes thick thighs, bare, exposed and ready, the other, the other you need to wiggle out of their jeans a little bit.

Both damn sexy.  Both achingly compelling.  Both just sitting behind that cage ready to burst for the ready and open palate that is there to surrender to their particular flavor of lust.  

Have fun?  Oh yeah, count on it, Randy.

As Jessica and Kevin poured splashes of the selected Pinot Noir-based champagnes in waiting glasses I was lucky enough to be able to slip into full on geek/nerd mode and watch as this patch of folks swooned over the giving-it-all-up style of lusty wine while a pocket of others on another table watched as the little hairs on their arms stood erect, their necks bent to take in another deep and loaded with intrigue sniff or sip.

After the bustling crowd was gone, I walked the stripped aisles of my Champagne department, rows upon rows of empty shelves, and ripped open case boxes and indicator that the object of many people's desire scooped up and taken home for the night.  

So, if I learned one thing that night, lust wears more than one outfit and there is a Champagne out there to seduce every palate and that in of itself, sexy as hell.

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